How to Differentiate Between Love and Friendship

It’s normal to love your friends. But how can you be sure that what you are feeling is not actually romantic love? Sometimes it might be hard to tell the difference between platonic friendship and a different kind of love. If you’re feeling confused, take some time to examine your relationship. Think about specific examples of times that you’ve experienced feelings of love. You can also consider your priorities. What are you looking for in a partner? Do you want to try to take the relationship to the next level? There are ways you can figure this out without risking the friendship.

1. Rate the intensity of your feelings. Spend some time thinking about how powerful your emotions are. You can feel many of the same things for both a friend and lover, but the degree to which you feel these things is often an indication of whether or not you love someone. In general, the more intensely you feel about a certain person, the more likely you are experiencing love.

• For example, you might feel chemistry with your friend because you both laugh at the same jokes and have an easy time talking to each other. When you love someone these feelings are more intense. You might feel giddy or excited.

2. Notice physical reactions. Your body can help you determine whether you’re in love. Your heart beat might become more rapid, you might feel like you have butterflies in your stomach, or you might become nervous and flustered. You will most likely not experience physical changes like this when you’re dealing with friendship.

• When you meet up with a friend, you are probably excited. However, you probably won’t experience any major physical changes when you see them or give them a hug.
• With someone you love, you may experience physical changes you can’t control. Your palms may sweat, your voice might become shaky, or your heartbeat could increase.

Compare this relationship to others. Think about how a certain relationship compares to the other friendships in your life. You probably have lots of friends, but you only feel love for one person. If you love someone, their relationship may be more important to you than the other people in your life. You may also feel a more intense connection to this person.

Method 2

Evaluating Your Priorities

1. Measure the time and attention you want to give. You can tell the difference between love and friendship by thinking about the amount of attention you give someone. If you love someone, you’ll likely think about them often and want to stay in regular communication with them. You probably won’t think of a friend as much throughout the day and won’t have the same longing to talk to them.

• You might think of your friend when something reminds you of them during your day—maybe a song you both like or a story that reminds you of an experience with them. W
• When you love someone, they’ll likely be on your mind throughout the day, whether you’re reminded of them or not

2. Figure out how much attention you want to get. You can determine if you have feelings of love by reflecting on how comfortable you are with the attention they give you. You may want someone you love to contact you more or hope that they think about you often throughout the day. Not hearing from a friend throughout the day won’t be as disappointing as not hearing from someone you love.

• If you are excited to hear from one of your friends frequently throughout the day or get butterflies in your stomach when their name pops up on your phone, this could indicate that you want to move the relationship in a new direction.

3. Talk to a friend or family member. It can be difficult to be objective about your own life. It might helpful to talk to someone you trust. This person can give you an outside perspective on how the person acts toward you and whether or not they believe it is just friendship or whether it could be love.

• For example, a friend may notice that the person you love looks at you when you’re not paying attention. They might also notice that the person talks about you a lot when you’re not there—another indication they think of you as more than a friend.

3. Reflect on your feelings. It can be difficult to truly understand what you’re feeling for another person. Doing so often takes a great deal of self-reflection. In order to figure out if you have friendly feelings or loving feelings for someone, be honest with yourself about how they make you feel.

• Make a list to keep track of your feelings throughout the week. Write down how you feel when you talk to this person or when you think about them. For example, you might write that you felt excited when this person called you or nervous when you were hanging out with them.

Reference: www.wikiHow.com